Leaving Alaska

Since the time I started travel nursing, I have always had a dream of spending a summer in Alaska. I waited 3 summers before a pediatric position finally opened up and I jumped at the chance to come! The day I got the news that I had received the job, I was ecstatic! Alaska seemed like this distant, mysterious and wild place to explore and adventure. Now I was going to be spending a summer there!

When I first got to Alaska, I just had to keep pinching myself. "I'm here! I made it to Alaska!" I kept thinking. I'm sure I had a huge smile permanently stuck on my face because people were looking at me a little funny that first day. I drove from Anchorage to Fairbanks the day after I arrived. It's usually a 6 1/2 hour drive, but it took me at least eight because I couldn't help but stop to take pictures at all these beautiful places along the way. Everything was so scenic and surreal.

After arriving in Fairbanks, I had a rough first few days because of a terrible living situation that I quickly realized I needed to get out of. By day three, I had packed up and checked myself into a hotel because I couldn't stay there another night. But just as He always does, God used a bad situation for something good and one of my friends from orientation who had just moved to Alaska with her husband offered for me a place to live with her and her husband..the very next day!

I moved into a nice big house in North Pole, Alaska with Becky and Nate the next day. North Pole is a cute town that's about fifteen minutes from Fairbanks. The first time I ventured into downtown, I couldn't stop smiling and taking pictures. North Pole is the town "where it's Christmas year round!" There are candy-cane light posts, Christmas signs and even a wreath and Christmas tree at City Hall. Not to mention, I got to visit the Santa Claus House where Santa lives and feed his reindeer! I fell in love with the town right away and the small-town feel. Sometimes I would run into coworkers at the grocery store (there's only one in the town) or other times complete strangers would just start chatting with me at the gas station. Everyone was so friendly and welcoming. It turned out to be the perfect place for me to live!

Feeding one of the reindeer at the Santa Claus House

Although I was no longer working at a Children's hospital, the pediatric unit in the community hospital proved to be a great place to work. My first week, my manager handed me the next month's schedule and said "I gave you 6 days off in a row because I thought you might want to do some exploring. I know you didn't just come to Alaska to work." I was dumbfounded and grateful and started planning where I would explore first.

Every time I had a stretch of 3-4 days off, I would plan an adventure. A few times, I had friends come to town and I took them with me on my adventures. Other times I would go with my roommates or other friends from town, and the rest of the time I just went on my own. I've always been a pretty independent person, but Alaska made me so much more independent. If I wanted to go camping, I didn't wait until a friend had time off, I would just go. I had my first solo camping experience about a month into my contract and after that, I had no problems going on my own. I would join tours flying solo and just make friends along the way. I did a bunch of solo road trips, including one that was 9-hours long in order to go paddle boarding through some icebergs. It was well worth it and the scenery wasn't too bad either!

In my 3 1/2 months in Alaska, I was able to see A LOT. There's still so much I would love to see and do, but I had a pretty big bucket list and hit almost everything. I got to hike to an icefield, hike on a couple of glaciers, ice climb, go into ice caves, deep-sea fish, sleep on a boat anchored in front of a glacier, kayak in Resurrection bay and see dolpins and seals, take several glacier cruises, do some amazing hiking, four wheel, camp in Denali, and visit the historic mining town of Kennicott.

At the edge of the Harding Icefield

Hiking the Matanuska Glacier

But one of my favorite bucket list activities happened my very last week in Alaska. I decided I still needed to see the Northern lights and told my roommates I was driving out to Cleary Summit to watch them. They must've stifled a laugh, knowing that you can't just decide you're going to see the Northern lights anytime. But I was determined. Nate told me I could see them from the backyard if they were out, but I insisted on following the advice of my friend who had recommended Cleary Summit since he had spent many years in Alaska.

As I left the house around 11:30pm, I could see what almost looked like a cloud just above the house. Something about it looked different, almost like there was a beam of light shining through it. "They're going to be out," I told myself with excitement. Within the first ten minutes of the drive, I could see the lights. They were bright green and lighting up in three different sections of the sky. They were so beautiful that it was hard to focus on the road and still look at the lights. If I had known that the lights tend to come and go so quickly, I would've pulled over to stop and watch them. I did stop once to snap a quick picture and then carried on up the road. I was sure the lights would be even better once I reached my destination. But as I arrived at Cleary Summit, the lights were beginning to fade and actually looked much more faint. Not to mention, there was a tour bus of people there. There was a full moon and it had come out even brighter, so now it was difficult to see the radiance of the Northern Lights. I stayed for awhile in hopes that I would see them some more, but ended up leaving disappointed and defeated. I headed home, scolding myself for not stopping off the road when I had seen them earlier. "Well, at least I saw them," I tried to reassure myself.

But at about 4am, I woke up in the middle of the night, looked out the window and saw rays of neon green. "They're out again!" I squealed. I felt like God had woken me up to watch this. I grabbed my warm jacket and camera and headed out the back door. The lights were amazing, so bright and beautiful. It was like ribbons of light in the sky, constantly changing from one place to another. Every now and then some green and pink would dance from top to bottom in the sky. As I watched the green ribbons light up, it was like God was doodling with some pretty colors and was letting me get a peek at his artwork. I stood there dumbfounded, completely in awe of our amazing Father. I couldn't help but think of the verse 1 Corinthians 2 that says "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him." I felt like I experienced a glimpse of what it will be like when we get to heaven and are stunned at the beauty and awesomeness of God and the place he has created for us.

I got to stay out and enjoy the Northern Lights for almost an hour before they began to fade. As I watched the lights show, I listened to worship music and felt completely overwhelmed by God's love for me. I wasn't disappointed about the lights after all! I felt like I got a private showing in my own backyard and it was incredible!

As my time in Alaska comes to a close, a lot of emotions are swirling around. Leaving this beautiful, unique place is very bittersweet. I am so grateful for the amazing experiences I have had, but sad to leave this wild, incredible place. I will miss the beautiful scenery, the ability to drive for miles and not see a single soul, seeing moose and foxes off the highway, eating fresh moose meat brought in by my coworkers or enjoying some fresh halibut or salmon caught by good friends. I will miss the peacefulness, the opportunities for adventure around every corner, and the wild feel to it all . But most of all, I will miss the amazing people I have come to know who have touched my heart, especially those who helped me to see what it truly means to be an Alaskan. But I have a feeling that I will be back again. This place has too many amazing things to offer to only visit one time!

Slapped with reality

Spoiled. Rotten. If I had to pick two words to describe how I felt about myself over the last few weeks in Africa, those would be the words. It's not because I'm high maintenance or demanding (at least I don't think I am most days). But when you get a smack in the face of the realities of poverty, you start to see the extremes of just how much we really have in America.

The past few weeks have been amazing. I have been able to make an impact on so many kids' lives in Malawi and then travel to Zambia to bring hope to many people who have never heard of Jesus. It has been incredible and overwhelming at the same time. 

The mission in Malawi was the first medical mission where I was outnumbered by the locals. It was so fun to be the only white person working on night shift...but it was also eye-opening. I heard the stories not only of the patients and their families, but also of the nurses working with me. 

Two of the nurses I worked with on the mission

Malawi is one of the poorest nations in Africa and the poverty hit me square between the eyes. Many of the children were dressed in clothes that were dirty and torn, the mothers didn't know how to use a disposable diaper b/c they had never used (or possibly seen) a diaper in their lives (they just tied cloths on them and would air them out when they got wet). The hospital was so poor and run down that they had to borrow several OR tables for surgeries from another hospital before we came because they only had two that weren't broken. I would see bugs in the ward on a regular basis and even saw a stray cat run through the ward one night. Another night, the hospital lost power and we had to work in the dark with our headlamps until the electrician could come and fix it. 

Got to spend time with lots of cute babies

The local nurses told me that it was not uncommon for the medical wards to have patients die on a regular basis because of the limitations of their hospital. It was probably the poorest hospital I've ever worked in. But at the same time, the patients and families were so happy with the surgeries. There were so many smiles and "thank-you's." I don't think I ever heard a patient or family complain about the conditions there. We tried to make it nice in the post-op ward, but it was still definitely sub-par by American standards. I can imagine the comments I would hear from my American patients if I put them in a room with 25 other patients with no air conditioning and bugs all over the place....or gave them a mattress and told them they basically had to sleep on the floor. I don't think that would go over so well.

Part of the "Thank You" ceremony the patients' families did for us

After that reality check in Malawi, I headed over to Zambia. I was working with local pastors in rural villages at least 100 km from the nearest hospital. I heard stories of children dying because their parents couldn't afford the malaria medicine which costs about $5. Another person told me that sometimes kids will be sick for a long time and even die because their families cannot afford to pay for transportation to the hospital (approximately $20 round trip). 

It all hit me the hardest the day I met Cami. We were doing home visits in the village and I noticed there was a little girl laying down inside one hut, only looking up occasionally. Finally her mom brought her out to us. The little girl was 7-years old, but very thin and weak. Her mom lifted up Cami's shirt so we could see how emaciated she was. You could see every single one of her ribs. Every bone in her body was prominent. She was literally skin and bones. Her mom set her down near us and the flies covered her face. She looked so weak and miserable. Suffering was written all over her face. But she wasn't this thin for lack of food. Her 3-year old brother was chubby and healthy. Her mom brought out Cami's medical record booklet, which showed she was born at a normal weight. She was right where she needed to be on the growth chart until somewhere between one and two years of age. Then her weight went significantly the opposite direction. Her mom told us she had started to have problems swallowing, along with intermittent vomiting. They had taken her to a local clinic a few times, but they couldn't figure out what was wrong. Her mother told us that they had wanted to take her to the big hospital, but they couldn't afford it. The medical care in Zambia is covered by the government, so all they needed to pay was transportation. But they didn't have $20. I sat there looking at Cami as her mom told us her story and I couldn't keep the tears from flowing. Things would never have gotten to this point in the States. I started thinking of IV nutrition, medical tests and all the things we could do for Cami if she was back in the U.S. It just wasn't fair. Here she was suffering and her mom had pretty much given up and accepted things the way they were. But it absolutely wasn't ok. No child should ever have to suffer like that. 

My first day meeting Cami

We asked if we could pray for Cami and her mom agreed and set her next to me. Cami was so weak that she just laid her head on my lap because it took too much energy to lift it. We laid hands on her and prayed for healing from the swallowing issues she was having. After we prayed, I had Cami sit up so I could try to give her some food. First her mom brought porridge. She ate it slowly, but got it down. Then I made her a vitamin drink with some dissolvable tablets that I had in my backpack. Gradually we moved from that to raisins, then small pieces of nuts that I had broken up for her. She was able to eat the food and she started perking up a little bit as I fed her. 

That night, her mom brought her to watch the Jesus Film at our camp. Afterwards, we asked if anyone wanted prayer. Cami's mom came up among several others and told us that Cami was doing better. She had eaten fish and shima (a local staple) after we prayed for her. It was the first time in a long time that she had been able to tolerate solid food. I came over to Cami to pray for her and laid my hand on her head. At that moment, she looked up at me with those big brown eyes. She looked into my eyes for a long time, then reached for my other hand and wrapped her little fingers around one of my fingers, just like a small baby would do. It was such a sweet moment. I could sense that she felt the love I had for her and prayed that she sensed God's love for her as well. 

The next day we arranged for Cami to go to the local hospital. I didn't see Cami again after that, but my friends at Trail Missions updated me the next week on how she was doing. Cami stayed in the hospital for almost a week and when she came home, they were able to bring her food and supplements to help her to gain weight with the money I had left with them. They have promised to keep me updated on her condition when they go back to visit her village.

It's so humbling to see children that are suffering like Cami and to hear stories of her and many others who can't afford a few dollars to pay to go to the hospital when their health or even their lives are in danger. We easily drop $20 or more on a dinner out or a night at the movies and don't give it a second thought. I recently heard a statistic that anyone who owns their own laptop is in the top 1% richest people in the world. Wow! I never really considered myself rich. I grew up in a middle class home. We always had enough, but we didn't necessarily always have the frills and fancy things like other kids. 

It's so easy to want more when you don't realize how much you've actually been given. But the truth is, compared to the rest of the world, most of us are filthy rich. I don't say that to make you feel guilty, but to make you stop and think. God said he had blessed Abraham so that he could be a blessing to others. I believe the same is true for us. We're not just blessed so we can hoard it and keep it for ourselves, but so we can bless others. We all know the saying that it's more blessed to give than to receive. That phrase may be a little cliché, but it is absolutely true. Our American culture is so self-centered. We are constantly taking selfies, absorbed in our own lives, plans, Facebook statuses, and finances that we rarely stop to see the needs around us. We get so caught up in the trivial things that we miss the many opportunities that God puts in front of us to sow into His Kingdom and make a lasting impact. The need may not be as obvious as an emaciated child who can't afford a ride to the hospital, but the need is still there if we take the time to look for it. 

My pastor recently said "In every room you walk into, there is some sort of need." It could be a need for a listening ear, a word of encouragement, a need for a friend, or some kind of material or financial need. But the need is there. We just have to get our eyes off ourselves long enough to see it. So who does God want you to bless today? Wherever you're at in your life, will you stop looking at the things you DON'T have and start looking at what you DO have and how you can use it to bless others? Chances are you're in that 1% of the population that has far more than you ever realized.